February 19

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Does Your Self-Talk Equal Self-Love?

I often truly ponder the concept of self-love.  Self-love is defined as what is in our head, our personal self-talk, what we tell ourselves, about ourselves.  It is our internal dialog that races along at a speed track pace, all day long!

Why are we so relentless and mean to ourselves?  We consume our time, our energy and our thoughts on this concept of self-hate.  We are all such insecure individuals just trying to make it in this world.  

When we can really step back and know that everyone is struggling with this self-love, an appreciation for themselves.  When I remind myself of this basic truth, I am able to be a little nicer to myself. I am able to step into the embrace of love and acceptance of who I am truthful.  

I am able to fight the strong chains of the untruths that plague my soul, deep down to its core.  I am able to stand up and declare the untruths and replace them with love, respect and glory of who I am, right now, where I am.

Have you ever stepped back and really dissected down your inner dialog?  The words that you speak to yourself daily, in every second? We are mean, nasty and hateful creatures when we look at this part of our being.  

When I look into my self-talk and I look at it as an outsider, a third party, so to say, I am appalled with myself.  How in the world could I speak these words? They are completely disgusting and ultimately cruel. I would never, in my right mind, ever think twice about speaking these words to even my worst enemy here on this earth.  

So then I ask myself, why would I tell myself these lies, these untruths every single day?  Why do I have these negative reels set on repeat every single day? Am I really worthless? Am I really not deserving of some self-kindness, some self-love, kindness?  

We all have that one thing that infects us like the plague.  Slowly killing us one small piece at a time. It is the rue that infects our bones, grossly eats away at our heart.  

If I am unable to love myself then how in the world can I be equipped to love others, to talk truths into those around me?  The truth is, that I can not. Not without stripping out the negativity and harsh words. Without administering the loving antibiotics to my soul, to kill off all of the intense infection that is eroding my heart with self-hate instead of self-love, I am useless to touch and uplift those around me.

I must fight off these words with positive truths that I may not believe at this second, but know that they are truths of a confident, positive woman.  If I am to love those around me, each and every day, I must start with self-love, speaking love into my own heart so that I can speak love into others. We are all so beautiful, so loving, so kind, we just have to reframe the way we treat ourselves.

 It is time for us to be brave enough to take off the masks that we wear daily.  To dig in deep and get to know who we really are. It is hard, but we must be vulnerable enough to accept your flaws and our weaknesses, this is what makes us human, makes us unique, individuals and real people.  

Alissa Pink White Flowers

We must walk into every day confident enough to accept and cherish our strengths. Don’t try to minimize them or hide them deep inside, they are truly your beautiful gifts, what makes you the unique individual that you are, they are to be shared with the people around you!

Brave is to accept these as who you are, embrace them and know that you will make mistakes, you will fail, but that is not what defines you.  You are so much more than your faults, you have so many positive unique gifts too!  

These gifts are just waiting to be shared with your circle of influence, whether that be friends, family or coworkers.  I am doing the best with what I have got. No, I am not perfect and will not always get things right. I will struggle, I will mess up and I will fall down.  I will be mean to myself, but the important thing is that I will stand back up, dust myself off, and grow from the experience and come out a better person on the other side.  I will choose self-love in order to love those around me. Today, I choose to be proud of who I am becoming. My wish is to always be evolving into a better version of myself, speaking kind words to my spirit.

Nobody is expecting you to be superhuman and know that our value is not contingent on how much we can be perfect and accomplish in a day.  No, sweet friend, you are valuable, where you are with who you are. You are valuable, you are loved and you are cherished. Never forget these truths, and truths that must be repeated to us on a daily basis!

~ Alissa Nelms



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