They say that beauty is in the eye of the beholder; real beauty is not about having the perfect symmetry or the ideal weight, clothes or make up. Beauty is not looking perfect to the standards of society.  No, it is about being about to look in the mirror to see a beautiful, God-created person staring back at you.

A person that is grounded, humble, giving, loving and a true reflection of grace... this is what beauty is.

All too often we stand in front of the mirror and state phrases such as, “I hate you”, “You are just a fat slob, when are you going to get it together”, “loser”, “You look ugly and no one likes you”, etc. How horrible are the things we tell ourselves as we look into that shiny thing projecting a picture of what we “think” we see? These negative words and beliefs are so condescending and debilitating.

These self-spoken words hurt much deeper and have such a stronger meaning then if others were to utter these negative words to us. Are these words that you would tell your best friend or those around you? Of course not, so why do we constantly say these horrible things to ourselves?

Beauty is about being about to look in the mirror to see a beautiful, God-created person staring back at you.

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Saying these things over and over to ourselves over time creates a deep-rooted hate for ourselves, leaving us to hate our bodies as we feel ugly, worthless and stupid. We are all created out of love and these negative thoughts and beliefs push us further and further away from the solid truth of who we are and are created to be. We are all beautiful and unique creatures, created for so much more than the constant negative thoughts and words that we say to ourselves day in and day out.

Allowing ourselves to say these words to ourselves over and over we, start to believe that these statements are true. Stopping these negative reinforcements is so hard to do, but the honest truth is that they are false, and we need to stop repeating these to ourselves on a daily basis.

We need to fill our mind and our thoughts with the things that are true. We were created beautifully just the way we are. Yes, we are all imperfect, as we live in an imperfect world. But we are not stupid, unworthy or ugly because of these imperfections.

When you don’t love yourself, or feel comfortable in your own body, you can’t function in life the way that you were designed to function. You can’t see what life has to offer or where you fit into the puzzle. The ugly imperfections and low self-esteem consume your thoughts, and your daily life becomes a toxic poison. You and I were made for so much more.

Society puts these awful thoughts and ideas in our head that are ludicrous and untrue, and then we take these “rules” about how we should be and turn them into negative thoughts and words that we constantly tell ourselves. We all just want to fit in to this perfect mold of society, when in fact this stupid society mold is so far from the truth and far from who we were created and designed to be.

This stupid society mold is so far from the truth and far from who we were created and designed to be.

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Instead of looking into the mirror and saying these negative thoughts, consciously say words such as “I am beautifully made”, “I am smart and intelligent”, and “I love who I am becoming each and every day”. At first you will never feel worthy, and you may even feel a bit silly and unbelieving, but that is OK!

Persistence and consistency is key. Eventually, our inner critic will start to believe these truths and we will begin to accept and love the person staring back at us. We can then begin to not care what society's mold tells us we should be, because that mold contains only lies and ignorance. 

You do not allow others to criticize you and judge you, so stop judging yourself. We have no right to be judging others, much less ourselves. A judgmental person has a weak mind and must put others down in order to lift themselves up... this is not fair to others or yourself, so stop!

These vessels that we live in are only temporary and borrowed... who we are within our soul is something that is priceless!

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We are more than just an outward appearance!  These vessels that we live in are only temporary and borrowed... who we are within our soul is something that is priceless.

Be true to yourself and trust that God created you and designed you just the way you are for a reason and His purpose, not our own. There is no “should be” this way or that way, you are uniquely and wonderfully made and designed and you are truly beautiful both inside and out. Once we accept this, we can become more loving and accepting of others.

We can begin living the life we were meant to live. We will face each day with confidence and gusto, with a completely different outlook on life!

We are worthy and amazing just the way we are. Today someone needs you, someone cares deeply about you, and you have the opportunity to love yourself and in turn allow yourself to love and care for others in a whole new light.

I challenge you today, to stand in front of that mirror and look deep into the eyes of the refection staring back at you and tell that person the truth, that you are loved, beautiful, smart and confident!

Let's Love More!

Alissa Nelms

Alissa at a park