Impacting others in unexpected ways is such a rewarding feeling for me. As I love and care for people, being able to touch lives in ways I never expected to is really one amazing high for me.  It is what gives me energy and a passion for life. Many people think that you have to say something deep or profound in order to touch another person’s life, but it is really quite the opposite. I don’t see myself as a super interesting, smart or funny person, yet I have (and we ALL have) the ability to make connections happen through little, unexpected ways every day.

Many individuals look to connect by spreading gossip or complaining about this or that to obtain a connection with others, in order to gain common ground and interests. To me, this is highly unnecessary, frivolous, and honestly... disheartening.

The most effective way that I have found to make a strong connection with others and truly make an impact on their lives is to ask open-ended questions. Really dig deeper into the persons thoughts and feelings. Instead of asking how is your day or how are you doing, dig deeper and ask, "what has been the best part of your day so far?". This way creates a greater connection as the other person has to really think about the question (instead of passively answering), and it shows them that you truly care about them and how their day is, instead of just being polite and asking them questions out of pleasantry.

Secondly, when you meet someone for the first time, instead of asking them the typical boring question about what they do for a living, try asking them a more positive feeling questions such as, "what does your ideal day look like?", or "what do you like to do for fun?!" Or, "what is the neatest thing that you have done or experienced this week?" You would be amazed at the responses you get and how a person’s face will light up as they see that you care about them and are making them ponder questions that make them feel good!

Caring for others allows for deep, profound connection and allows you to touch and impact other people’s lives in unknown ways!

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Lastly, maybe try and ask people about them, their life, their family, their joys, their struggles. All too often I feel that we are so focused on us and our life that we have blinders on to the world around us. Caring for others allows for deep, profound connection and allows you to touch and impact other people’s lives and many ways that are unknown to you!

People will be amazed and surprised when you ask the questions that they don’t regularly get asked on any given day. You will surprise them and they will remember you!

The best conversations that I have found with people involve me just listening as the other person does the majority of the talking. We were given two ears and one mouth for a reason. People are just waiting and wanting to be heard and have someone just listen to them. Make it a priority today to genuinely listen to someone today, get creative with your questions.

 Open up the ears that God gave you and take an interest in someone’s life.  I guarantee you that you won’t be disappointed with the results!

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Alissa Nelms

Alissa in front of flowers